Category Archives: randomness

random ramblings of Yours Truly.

randomness 2 Comments

Ehh.

I have a couple of witty ideas for blog entries, and I wanted to document yesterday’s LakeShoremen Brass rehearsal, but I just feel kind of ehh. Aaron’s even home for the week, and still I feel ehh. I did manage to successfully install MT-Blacklist, and for that I feel a little less ehh, although I won’t know if it’s not working until… well, until it doesn’t work.

I’m going to go see what Aaron’s found to watch on TV. Oh, yeah, and I’m going to stop drinking so much Caffeine-Free Diet Coke, because I’m belching like… um… like I did in college. Except quieter.

humor

Nice Lexus

Received in my work e-mail today:

A lady walks into a Lexus dealership and browses around. Suddenly she spots the most perfect, beautiful car and walks over to inspect it.

As she bends forward to feel the fine leather upholstery, an unexpected little burst of flatulence escapes her. Very embarrassed, she anxiously looks around to see if anyone has noticed and hopes a sales person doesn’t pop up right now.

As she turns back, there standing next to her is a salesman. With a pleasant smile he greets her, “Good day, Madam. How may we help you today?”

Trying to maintain an air of sophistication and acting as though nothing had happened, she smiles back and asks, “Sir, what is the price of this lovely vehicle?”

Still smiling pleasantly, he replies, “Madam, I’m very sorry to say that if you farted from just touching it, you are gonna shit when you hear the price.”

randomness

Resolutions

Well, it wouldn’t be a proper New Year without a resolution. In years past, I’ve tried multiple angles on the Resolution: one simple thing (last year’s resolution to brush my teeth more), one obvious thing (losing weight, multiple years), or a combination thereof.

This year, I’m trying a new angle: a to-do list categorized under one broad idea. The theme for 2005 is “Preparing For The ‘Mom Thing.'”

Not about my Mom. Like, about me being one. Scary, eh?

So, the way I figure, I need to kick up the responsibility factor a notch if I’m ever going to be responsible for another human being. That, and to keep Aaron from eventually kicking me in the teeth with frustration. It would happen, I’m sure.

This could obviously take on several discrete tasks. The main ones I’m thinking of are:

  • Lose 20 more pounds or 2 more dress sizes by Autumn 2005
  • Find and see a local doctor (general practicioner / family doctor) and a girlie doctor (aka an OB/GYN)
  • Unpack my boxes of keepsakes and scrapbooking items currently taking up space in the small bedroom
  • Brush my teeth more often, with the prescribed Tooth Maintenance™
  • Be punctual (leave for work on time, arrive on time)
  • Be more domestic, in terms of cleaning house

The list in my head is more detailed, true, but there are some things that aren’t for public consumption. I’m sure you don’t need to hear all the gory details about my potential exercise routines or my regime of Tooth Maintenance™ (although Amy knows all about that, and so does Aaron).

So, yeah. I need to do some self-improvement, as per usual. Maybe if I focus on preparing myself to be a better caregiver—no, say it: to be Someone’s Mommy—then maybe that will give me the impetus to be a better person now.

randomness 1 Comment

Damn These Dreams

I had a dream last night that I found out my husband was sleeping with someone else while I was away from the house. In the dream, it was someone I knew, but not in real life. I don?t remember how I found out, but I remember feeling like I?d been punched in the stomach. (That was a regular occurrence when I was little, so I know how it feels.) I was ready to forgive him, though, except for one thing:

?So, what do you say?? I asked him in the dream, referring to what they did during the act itself. ?Do you tell her you love her?? He said he did.

That was even worse than being cheated on physically. The idea that he could not just make love to someone else, but actually *love* someone else hit me the worst in my dream.

Don?t worry, Aaron, I know it was just a weird dream, and that you wouldn?t actually do anything like that… It was still disturbing, though.