Boobs.

My boobs used to be size D. That was when I was technically obese, though. Now that I’m on the cusp of being merely “overweight,” my boobs have reduced to somewhere between C and D.

I tell you this because today I rediscovered the joy of the shelf bra.

Now, last year, I bought a few tank tops through mail-order that had shelf bras in them. And I decided that said shelf bras were overrated, because they did absolutely nothing to hold anything in. For some reason, though, today I decided to put on my blue racerback tank with shelf bra, and to go with only the shelf bra for support. (I was just hanging around at home after work.)

And, lo and behold, the damn thing works.

Mind you, I can’t go jogging or anything in this, and my boobs still tend to migrate together into the uniboob, like with a sports bra. But, still… once I lose the remaining pudge around the middle, I could so wear this in public.

Just thought I’d share.

My Birthday

So, many of you may be wondering, what was my birthday surprise? And what did I do before said 4:00 birthday surprise?

The day started like most Saturdays: with a trip to the Happy Rose Buffet. Aaron and I then went hunting for garage sales, being that it was sunny and gorgeous outside and sales should have been in full swing — but, alas, the few we found were barely worth getting out of the car for.

I did open my present(s) from Aaron, too. He got me the Dune special edition DVD and Logan’s Run on DVD, and also got me a Lane Bryant gift card. Squee!

Around 4:00, there was a knock on the door — and it was Sheryl! @whee! She brought me a birthday card (complete with her own Grim Reaper artwork), Hello Kitty stickers, a gift card to Home Depot (yay, plants!), and the You Grow Girl book I had listed on my Amazon wishlist. We hung out for a couple hours, just talking and shooting the shit, before she had to go get some food and head back to Columbus. That was an awesome surprise. Thank you, Sheryls! (Oh, and your Mom’s seventies golf clubs? Quite the swanky set.)

After Sheryl left, Aaron and I headed out to Wildwood to walk around and enjoy the weather. As we walked down the bike path (we weren’t wearing our walking shoes, and had to stick to the paved areas), we saw about six deer crossing the railroad tracks. That was cool.

Then came dinner. As usual, we waffled on where to go. We’re so indecisive about restaurants. We ended up deciding on Outback Steakhouse, and having the Bloomin’ Onion and the Outback-Style Prime Rib. Mmm. Then we came home and ate some Twinkie-misu for dessert.

Overall, I had a very low-key but pleasant 30th birthday.

I wish I had written in my diary/journal back when I turned 12, though, because I really felt a connection to how I felt back then — kind of like Life was moving faster than I was prepared to go. I distinctly remember making a comment about not wanting to grow up, and I remember my Aunt Sammie finding that preposterous. I was scared, though; in a few months, I’d be going to Junior High, graduating to a new Sunday School class, maybe having my “womanhood” rear its ugly head, and all I wanted to do was watch Dance Party USA and read Star Trek books and hang out with my Mom and her boyfriend.

The irrational fears that are in the back of my mind are a little different now. I’m close to half-done with my life — how fucked up is that?! I haven’t done half the things I wanted to by now, really. And being an agnostic/atheist isn’t all it’s cracked up to be, I’ll tell you what. It would make my occasional fear of mortality a little easier to swallow if I thought I’d be seeing my stepdad Tom and my Memaw and my Granny and meeting Aaron’s Mom and all that shit when I die. As it is, death scares the living fuck out of me. Nonexistence is a tough pill to swallow.

Yes, I know, I’m only 30. But when I’m PMSing and being all funky before bed, weird shit goes through my head sometimes. And poor Aaron didn’t know what to make of the fact that I was all weepy on my birthday, when he was trying to be all Happy Birthday for me. And then he got all sweet and said that we were going to grow old together and use the next generation of Viagra so he can “knock my cobwebs out,” which was sweet in its own Aaron-ish way, and made me weepy all over again. (Poor boy just can’t win.)

I’m feeling much better now, though. It really was just PMS, I think. That, and remembering some crazy dream I had a few months ago where I thought that Aaron and I were going to die. That freaked my shit out. But maybe I’ll share that one later.

Something is Afoot

Aaron’s just as good at keeping birthday secrets as I am. Don’t worry, whoever you are (and I have an idea, maybe, but I’m not saying): we’ll be here at 4pm on Saturday.

I don’t want to know what’s up. I don’t want to spoil the surprise. Just knowing that somebody didn’t forget my birthday is pretty cool.

As for birthday present tallies so far: Amy got me a Lomo Oktomat and a DVD of Drawn Together (which I’ve heard is damn funny, but I haven’t watched yet) for Christmas and birthday. I’m pretty sure Aaron got me some DVDs, although I’m not sure which ones. I’m guessing that at least one of them is intended to fill out the Diana’s Favorite Movies Collection. Previous movies in this set include Victor/Victoria, The Goonies, The Princess Bride, Young Sherlock Holmes, The Dark Crystal, The Last Unicorn, Labyrinth, and probably a few others that I’m not thinking of right now. (We already had the Director’s Cut editions of all the Star Trek movies, so those were covered.)

If you’d like to get me something for my birthday, and I know this is a little late, but you can feel free to peruse my Amazon wishlist. I actually set the thing up so I can remember stuff I’d like to buy when I have money burning a hole in my pocket… but I’m not above pimping my wishlist on my birthday.

Definitely Still Sick

Were I not sick, I would scoff at the idea of heading up to bed before 10pm. Tonight, though, I’m seriously considering it. Head upstairs, lay down, read, play some solitaire on my Palm IIIc, and be asleep *well before* 11pm.

I suppose I need the rest. Hopefully I’ll be able to convince myself to get up when I wake up in the morning — which will most certainly be long before my alarm wakes me up. I’ll do my showering and assembly of lunch and snackies then.

Man, this cold is kicking my ass.

Birthday Meme

I hadn’t planned on posting this to my blog, but since I’ve already posted my results in the comments of three different LiveJournals, maybe I should just go for it. For reference, I originally saw this on  sheryls‘ LJ, but it’s run rampant since, so I guess I’ve snicked this from pretty much the entire internets.

Go to Wikipedia and look up your birth day (excluding the year). List three neat facts, two births and one death in your journal, including the year. [My 30th birthday is coming up on April 22nd, in a couple of weeks.]

Events:
1509 – Henry VIII ascends the throne of England after the death of his father.
1970 – First Earth Day celebrated.
1993 – The web browser Mosaic version 1.0 is released.

Birthdays:
1937 – Jack Nicholson, American actor
1950 – Peter Frampton, British musician

Death:
1996 – Erma Bombeck, American humorist and writer (b. 1927)