writing

Day One of Not-NaNo

I am officially NOT participating in NaNoWriMo this year. I am, however, budgeting at least one hour per day (preferably two) during the month of November to work on last year’s NaNo.

Tonight, I successfully rearranged my story bible wiki into a more navigable tree; I fleshed out my female lead’s background and personality; and I rewrote an argument between my male and female leads that had been bothering me and was a big part of why I’d stopped writing on this story. I’d painted myself into a corner, and I’ve successfully unpainted myself with this rewrite. Making the male lead do what he wanted to do, instead of walking off silently and meekly without even a “fuck you,” really added some dimension to their relationship and to their personalities.

I also did some more succubus/incubus research online. There are several resources on the internet that start with, “the only way to kill a succubus is” — and they all end with something different. Burning her. Starving her of sex. Trapping her in her own reflection. And so forth. With all these ideas, though, I’m finally coming up with a halfway decent idea of how my Guild of immortals probably hunts down and destroys incubi and succubi.

I’m not sure what I’ll do tomorrow evening, but I’m sure I’ll make some more headway of some sort.

ruminations 4 Comments

I Miss That.

Time was when my Mom and I would go visit my Aunt Sammie, cousin Michael and Memaw every Sunday after church. We didn’t always enjoy or appreciate the visits, but it just seemed like the thing you do on Sundays: go to visit family, eat the lunch they’ve prepared for you, listen to them complain or just talk, then politely excuse yourself to go home and get out of your Sunday clothes.

Thirteen years later, Mom lives with my step-Gary in Texas, Sammie and Michael live in Carolina, and Memaw’s three years gone now. And I don’t even go to church anymore.

Even though I’m all connected with the world and with my faraway friends via the magic of the internet, I feel isolated from my family. I don’t understand how we were once so interdependent and loving and familiar, and now we’re so far apart, both geographically and emotionally. I just don’t get it.

randomness 2 Comments

Low-Key Evening

Aaron’s off at a Frank Black show in Cleveland with Kris and Kris this evening. I opted not to go for several reasons, not the least of which being that I have to work tomorrow. Instead, I ended up throwing together a (half-assed) Halloween podcast, which frees up tomorrow night for my annual Halloween genealogy devotional.

The time change seems to be catching up with me tonight, too. It’s not even 10pm yet, and already I’m feeling like it’s time to wash the dishes and go to bed. Yesterday’s leaf-raking extravaganza has well and truly taken hold, as well, so my back and arms are hella sore and stiff, which is also helping to edge me toward bed.

Good thing I didn’t end up going to the show — I’d be turning into a pumpkin barely halfway through, and putting a damper on everyone’s good time.

weight loss 4 Comments

Patting Myself on the Back

I’ve kept track of my weight in Excel ever since December of 2002. Yep, I’m in it for the long haul.

It does me good sometimes to remember how far I’ve come, and how good I’ve managed to stay, for the most part. I lost fifty, gained ten, and lost ten again.

Also: look where the big post-loss gains are. Christmas 2004 and Thanksgiving/Christmas 2005. Tell ya something? Tells me that I don’t work off that holiday hogging, and I let it get the best of me instead. I’m all for enjoying Christmas dinner with Aaron’s family, and even eating “evil” foods like stuffing and sweet potatoes and dessert (OMG sausage cake!). This year, though, I need to be all for ramping up the workouts the week afterward, too.

Just a quick pick-me-up pep talk, and a reminder that I don’t suck. Now I need to walk my talk.

randomness

New Weight Loss Program: Depression

Certain kinds of depression cause me to overeat. I just basically wear a path in the carpet between my chosen point of food consumption and the kitchen. Then I feel like an ass and get more depressed and eat more. Rinse and repeat.

Other kinds of depression cause me to not give a damn about eating, and to find that everything in life is basically a waste of my time. Had I discovered this interesting brand of depression back in high school, at least my perpetual depression would have had some practical purpose, or at least a more positive side-effect than weight GAIN.

As it is, I’m currently making some chicken salad because I know that today’s combined repast of a breakfast bar, an apple, a yogurt, and a string cheese will not get me through the evening. Eventually, if I don’t eat, something will snap, and I’ll find myself standing in front of a near-empty refrigerator, wondering what the hell happened.