family

Lung Cancer Sucks

I’m not a smoker. But I’d imagine that, as the average twenty-year-old smoker drags on his or her brand of choice, he’s not thinking of the good time he could be having in about 50 years: laying in a hospital bed, losing his hair, being inundated with various chemicals and drugs to sear away the cancer that usurps his lungs.

My grandmother is 70 years old, and she has lung cancer.

When I first heard, almost a month ago (?!), Aaron and I had just chosen a final wedding date. For a fleeting moment, I considered moving my wedding date up a few months, but thought better of it. After all, wouldn’t that be a vote of inconfidence in her ability to pull through? So I called her up in the hospital and told her that at least her hair will have grown back by May.

I seem to be the least worried of everyone, except my Memaw. I wonder sometimes if I shouldn’t be more concerned, considering her age and all. Mom says Memaw has good days and bad days. Tuesday was a bad day, and she was asleep when Mom came to visit. Thursday, however, was a good day, since Memaw was downstairs playing bingo when Mom called to check on her. 🙂

I refuse to be angry at Memaw, though. Sure, this cancer could be pinned down to her decades of smoking — but what will it help to blame the victim? I’d rather just go to the women’s cancer specialty shop and buy her a head scarf or three for her birthday.

wedding

Sweet Dreams are Made of These

You know how, before the first day of school, you would have those "I was at school and didn’t know what my classes were and it was the day of a test and I forgot my pants" dreams? This weekend, I had my first pre-wedding dream. Seven months till D-Day, and already I’m having them.

The wedding was out in the country, at someone’s house. We had to drive out there, and I think I had to go quickly from somewhere. Work or something. At any rate, I had to let my bridesmaids pack my bag and all my stuff, including dress, shoes, hair thingies, change of clothes, etc. Amy (my maid of honor) must have been meeting us later or something, because Mel (bridesmaid #2) was driving me out to the wedding site. We had a tender moment in the car, regarding how much I trusted the judgement of my closest friends, and that’s why I chose them all to join my in my special day.

When we got there, I had to go in the bathroom and change into my wedding garb. Instead of having one of my ladies come in with me, I had my mom help me out. I laid out all my stuff on the floor outside the bathroom door and came to some realizations: 1.) My dress was not pressed; 2.) All I had for hose were the knee-hi’s I wear to work; 3.) I had never gotten my dress altered.

I’ll stop the dream account there, because I distinctly remember some evil magical thing happening in the house, me having to carry my dress elsewhere, and two guests being turned into puppy dogs.

ruminations

Self-esteem

As a prelude, let me say that Krys did indeed get back to me. She’s going to law school at Akron U, and has a job lined up as a judicial attorney at the Court of Appeals after her graduation in May. She owns a house in Akron, and she’s still single. (No, she’s not looking, either, so stay your wild e-mail volleys.)

This made me think. Christy’s going to be a lawyer. (Sorry… I meant Krys. Old habits.) The fact made me reflect on how I’ve done so far, as compared to some of my old friends:

  • Krys is single, a homeowner, and (nearly) quite gainfully employed in a high-prestige profession.
  • Last I heard from Carolyn, my best friend from Middle School, she had just gotten married, was taking computer classes at the local community college, and worked as a secretary for an insurance company.
  • Mechelle from Florida got knocked up in 10th grade and quit school. At last contact, her two kids were in the custody of her aunt, and she was working at Burger King. (Of course, that was about ten years ago.)
  • Amy, my roommate from college, got her Bachelors in Biology and moved back to where she grew up in SW Ohio. She currently holds a managerial / administrative position at a genetics lab.

No, this isn’t meant to air everyone’s dirty laundry. It’s meant to set up a comparison. Look at me: I have my Bachelors degree, but am working in a completely unrelated field. I don’t have a car, so I take the taxi. Aaron and I rent a duplex. We’re engaged to be married in May. In some ways, I’ve ended up much better off than my friends have. In some ways, I’m far behind the pack.

In any case, it’s a measure of my self-esteem that I don’t need to look at my friends’ lives to know that I’m happy. I’m proud of my achievements, and I know my shortcomings, and I don’t dwell on either. There were days in my teens when I compared myself to everyone I knew and made myself miserable over it. Now it’s just an interesting exercise.

Who knew that me, Little Miss D-Minus In Algebra II, would get a job at a bank?

randomness

Classmates.com

Did you know that, on Classmates.com, you can register as an alum of your elementary school? Serious. There is this one friend, Mechelle Dunphy, that I totally lost touch with back in middle school, and it occured to me that I might find her that way. Of course, It didn’t work. (Why would it actually work out the way I’d planned?) I did find another friend from further back, though: from 2nd Grade as opposed to 5th. I hadn’t talked to this friend since we were in high school, so I looked at her info. And since I don’t pay Classmates.com $3 a month, I could only see the first line of her bio:

"After wandering aimlessly from state to state, living in five or six rather strange…"

And that’s all I got. Aargh! So, of course I had to go to Google. After about ten minutes of searching, I finally found her in the law department at the University of Akron. At least, I assume it’s her… although many people could have the name "Christina Smith," I’m guessing that there are much fewer that also go by "Krys." I sent off an e-mail to the address I found, so we’ll see what happens.

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Zankoku na Tenchi no Southpark

So, I found this fun Southpark Character Generator on the web from surfing off of one of Aaron’s favorite anime message boards. Now, after trying to make a Southpark character that looks like me, I understand why people think Donna Davies and I look alike. No matter how hard I tried to make me, I ended up making Donna. Nothing against either of us… it’s just how it worked out.

The entire point of going there, though, was to create one of my favorite anime characters, Ayanami Rei from Evangelion. This required only minimal post-Flash Photoshop touch-ups (I added the red stripes and Eva 00 on the plugsuit, and the interfaces on her head). If you want to know why this is funny, you need to watch Evangelion.